I’ve watched it at least eleven times. It’s the one video that defines what I hope is the future of art and how creators can firmly stand out. It was filmed in 2016. The location was NYU. Legendary rapper-producer, Pharrell Williams, stopped by a classroom to provide feedback on the latest creations of a group of budding musicians. In the first two demos he was asked to critique, Pharrell went through the motions without showing much emotion.

“Don’t spend a second of your time marketing your work. Focus solely on learning how to write so well that other people feel inclined to share it.” When I began writing, I was given this piece of advice. At the time, I was juggling my own coaching clients, a communication consultancy with a small team, and a two-year-old. My friends' advice was the exact permission I needed. Spending my days on social media was not how I wanted to use the little free time I had each day.

This past September I took an extended break from writing for the first time in five years. I thought I’d have an itch the first few days during my month hiatus to pick up a pen. But that desire didn’t come which solidified my belief I was burned out. I began writing in late 2016 and stumbled upon this platform randomly in 2017 after reading an article from my friend Niklas Göke.

My biggest challenge isn’t coming up with ideas, it’s fighting to find the best ones. When I started writing four years ago, I never thought this would be the case as publishing 10 posts felt like it might as well be 8,732. But it’s true what they say — “The more you write, the easier it becomes!” — as much like our verbal conversations, the doors our written word open can take us down endless rabbit holes.

A short reminder that attention is given to those who give it In his book, “Influence,” author Robert Cialdini tells the story of Joe Girard: a car salesman who on average sold five cars a day during his career landing him the top spot in the “Guinness Book of World Records.” Eager to learn how Joe was able to stand out, Cialdini studied Joe’s process and what he found was a simple man with an even simpler system.

If you walk long enough, you’ll arrive Every week I get a few emails asking for writing advice — especially from people who don’t have the time or desire to publish an article every day of the week and 37 on Sunday. With two young kids and bills to pay, I try to answer most messages I get. But writing isn’t my only job and I don’t move as quickly as some other people.

As an American living in Spain, it didn’t take me long to realize that most Europeans aren’t massive fans of the self-help world. In fact, the majority of my friends loathe it with the same intensity as they do most politicians. For the longest time, to avoid the punches in the gut, I kept the dirty secret that I was pumping out self-help articles on a weekly basis to myself. But two years ago, after an article went viral, I came clean and I told my buddies about my little hobby.

A few weeks ago, a friend shared an article on Facebook by Miyah Byrd entitled “How A Late-Night Ugly-Cry Session During Quarantine May Have Saved My Marriage.” It was tremendous. I rarely finish an article — let alone ones that run for eight minutes. From start to finish, however, at every turn, I was right there with her. This isn’t the only time something like this has happened. In fact, it takes place all the time.

I live in a small town in Catalunya. Combine this with having two young kids, and when it comes to pop culture, I’m out of the loop. Roughly a year ago, however, a friend of mine sent me an email with a link to a bunch of Dos Equis commercials featuring a character aptly dubbed “The Most Interesting Man in The World.” I may be a decade late to the joke, but I’ve gotten caught up.

The good news is you don’t even have to post anything I hate social media. It does my head in. But I also know as someone who writes and enjoys making money from it that marketing is important. That being said, over the last two years, I’ve been looking for the platform that gives me the biggest bang for its buck for the time investment I make. I’ve found Twitter to be great for testing ideas and getting in front of people I admire.

After returning home from vacation, Chris Hurn’s young son couldn’t find Joshie, his favorite stuffed animal giraffe. Like most adults when we lose our phone, Chris’ son wasn’t happy. He dreaded the thought of having to sleep without his favorite buddy. That night, in an attempt to appease his son, Chris told him a little lie. “Joshie is fine,” Chris said. “He’s just taking an extra-long vacation at the resort.”

There is no right or wrong way to write — just your way Last December I sat down and I added up the total number of views my articles had received over the year. When the dust settled, my numbers sat a touch under 160,000. I can still remember the excitement in my voice when I shared the news with my wife. I was stoked. Never in a million years would I have thought that over 10,000 people a month would read my work.

Building a small, exclusive tribe is the ultimate career move At the beginning of 2018, I set a challenge for myself: reach out and speak to one new person a week whose work I admired. This exercise alone was worth its weight in silver. But what turned it to gold was eventually asking all of the people I’d been meeting to come together under one roof so we could all get to know each other better and share ideas.

Last month, I sat down with my accountant in Barcelona to wrap up my taxes. Prior to finishing them, I reminded her that I had earned $621 over the course of 2018 writing on Medium. She looked at me funny, which I’ve come to expect from people here in Spain whenever I mention Medium. After asking me if I was a fortune teller, she inserted the figures into my ledger. She then assured me that failing to report minimal amounts like $600 wouldn’t bring the cops to my door.

Paying an editor helps too A month after arriving in Vietnam, my dad was asked to give a presentation in front of the big wigs. Before taking the stage, he put his work in front of his boss for feedback. “This is good”, his boss said, “but cut it in half.” My dad was dumbstruck. But he bit his tongue, sat down, and got rid of every single word that didn’t serve a purpose.

San Fransisco, August 14th, 1921 — A young Hungarian man had just rolled into town and was eager to let everyone know he had arrived. He needed to make friends with the press and he had an idea of how to make this happen. Later that day, he walked into a building, climbed seven flights of stairs, put on a straightjacket, and promptly threw himself out of a window. A little dramatic, yes, but the man wanted press.

“Hey man, I think this post is pretty good. But the title of “9 Decisions That Led to a Life I Love” isn’t doing it for me. Got any suggestions?” “Yeah, it’s a bit dry,” my friend replied 38 seconds later over Slack. “Try throwing ‘How to Wake Up Smiling’ in front of it as you reference that in the intro. I woke up the next day hoping the stats from the article would indeed make me smile.

“My favorite thing about today is nobody bit me!” In an instant, the words of my 2-year-old son transported me back to the first day I taught English. The year was 2010. The place was a 45-minute bus ride from Sants Estacio station in Barcelona to a town I’ll never purposely visit again. As a 32-year-old single guy, teaching a bunch of 6-year-olds how to say the word sandwich in English wasn’t what I had in mind when I bought a one-way ticket to the Catalan capital months prior.

Don’t kill your darlings “This is just a theory, but I think I know why your writing gained traction — you lived 30+ years without a smartphone!” My friend Jake Daghe recently said this to me and I couldn’t help but agree. When I began writing, the fact I couldn’t rely on technology to entertain myself growing up made it easy to consistently come up with stories to tell. But regardless of the experiences I had, I still needed to learn how to write in a way that made my articles memorable and helpful to the people reading them.